Busting Birth Parent Stereotypes

 

By Melissa Williams, LCSW // Executive Director

beautiful birth mother

 

I know it’s been said before, but I have to say it too: Birth mothers are the most amazing people ever.

But seriously. These women. These birth moms. They are exceptional. They are full of beauty and grace. Every day I work with these tremendous human beings, and I want you to know what I know:

That they are strong. That they are selfless. That they work hard. That they love hard.

We’ve all encountered the stereotypes. Some people hear “birth mom” and think . . . Drug addict. Didn’t care. Welfare queen. Couldn’t be bothered.

I’m here to tell you that in all the 20+ years I have worked in adoption, I have never met this birth mom.

The birth moms I know? They’re courageous. They’re in school. They’re working. They’re raising families. They’re battling personal challenges. They’re already doing hard things, and then they’re put in a position to make a really hard choice. And I see them, time and again: choosing life. Sacrificing their bodies through pregnancy and childbirth. And then sacrificing their hearts to give their babies what they believe is their very best chance at life.

I recently worked with a woman who bravely chose to carry her baby to term, despite the fact that the pregnancy was the result of an assault.

The image with the quote above? That’s a real birth mom, someone I had the privilege of working with, someone who sacrificed her own heart on the altar of what she believed was best for her child.

Many of these mamas could parent, but they wanted more for their babies. Sometimes they wanted them to have a two-parent family. Sometimes they wanted their child to be raised by parents with more experience and preparation.

But ultimately, these are not women who are motivated by what is best for them. These are women who are interested in what is best for their children. In choosing to place a child for adoption, they are looking beyond themselves. They are making tremendous sacrifices. They are loving beyond personal consequences.

These birth moms, they inspire me every day.

Every. Single. Day.

They are my heroes.

 

 

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