If you’re pregnant and not in a place to parent your child, you have two choices — adoption or abortion. The number of abortions performed in the U.S. is exponentially higher than the number of infant adoptions that take place. Does that mean abortion is better? Not necessarily.
Part of the reason some women choose abortion over adoption is simply a lack of information. Many women don’t know that there are so many more families waiting to adopt than babies available for adoption. Some don’t think about adoption because a pregnancy is too expensive. They don’t know that most of the time, their medical care, and hospital bills are paid for by either an agency or the adoptive couple.
Some women feel that carrying a child to term only to place them for adoption would hurt too much. Regardless of whether you abort or choose adoption, you don’t go home with a baby. I question why aborting the child would be less painful than placing it. There are so many issues that are solved with abortion that adoption could solve just as well. If a woman doesn’t want to have an abortion, there is no reason (barring medical necessity) that she should have to.
This is not to say that adoption does not have its drawbacks. Carrying a pregnancy to term and placing a child is difficult as well. However, for me, adoption has been so much better than abortion. If I had chosen abortion as the answer to my unplanned pregnancy, I would never have looked into the beautiful blue eyes of my birth daughter.
If I had aborted, a beautiful family would be without their daughter. Choosing adoption enabled me to help complete a family that had been waiting for a child for so long. I have never seen two parents more in love with a child than my birth daughter’s adoptive parents are with her. I know this because I am a part of a beautiful open adoption relationship that inspires me to be better every day.
Adoption has added to my life in such a wonderful way. Even though I wasn’t in a place to parent my baby, I’m glad that I had her. In the beginning, I wished it would just all go away, that I wouldn’t have to go through with this unplanned pregnancy. But I’m so glad I did. I found a family for her that was so excited to love and raise her. I became a better person. My life is infinitely better having chosen adoption over abortion.
Annaleece Merrill is a birth mother to the cutest little girl on earth. She loves being an advocate for open adoption by writing, mentoring, and speaking at adoption panels. She attends Utah State University in Logan, Utah.