Choosing to place a child for adoption is a very personal decision. It takes a lot of thought and soul searching to know if it’s right for your child. Even after looking at all your options and considering your circumstances, everyone’s conclusion will be different. But there are good reasons to place a baby for adoption.
A Child’s Needs
When I got pregnant unexpectedly, I had to go over everything I wanted and expected for my children, and if the circumstances I was currently in were going to fit that standard. These were some of my standards and expectations:
—A steady father figure.
—The means to supply the necessities of life.
—An education to get a better job to provide for him.
—A safe environment.
There were plenty of other requirements, but just those were reason enough to place my child. I definitely didn’t want to place him, but when it comes down to it, I was dealing with another person’s life; it’s not a time to be selfish and think about what we, as birth mothers, will miss out on. It’s more about what your child will miss out on. Mine would have missed out on a father (or any sort of positive male figure for that matter), food on the table every night, new clothes when he grew out of them, a mom who had the time and knowledge to help him with his homework. He would have had an extremely rough life being with me.
This is not to say that my standards should be everyone else’s standards, or that those who choose adoption couldn’t have parented. I considered things I couldn’t forgive myself for withholding from him. All children deserve the best, and I couldn’t give the best to him. That is ultimately how I knew I needed to place him. If you set the bar and see where you fit on it, keeping their well-being in mind, you’ll do the right thing, and for good reasons. No choice you make will be easy, but if you do what you know is right for that child you love so much, it will have been the easiest choice.
You may also want to read 10 Things To Know When Pregnant And Considering Adoption
Lindsey Olsen is a birth mother who placed her son in 2012. She is also a parent to a beautiful little girl, and wife to (who she thinks is) the most amazing man in the world. Her favorite things are her faith, her family, and her country.